I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
