Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
