i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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