I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
My penis needs a shock collar
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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