Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Randomize
