Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
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