Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
