chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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