Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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