I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
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