he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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