And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize
