walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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