I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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