make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
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