What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
