The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
