either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
