i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
