i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
