I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
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