This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Randomize
