She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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