Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
