i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
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