it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Randomize
