We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize
