just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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