Grow some girl-balls and come out already
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
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