Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Randomize
