I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize
