dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Randomize
