Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
