found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
