There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
