Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
