What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
