He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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