What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
