Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize