i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
