there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
