at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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