thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
