Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
