I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
