chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
