The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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