Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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