Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
